A few weeks ago I got an email from my Ron Paul MeetUp group informing me that there was going to be a Bay Area GOP Straw Poll at the Holiday Inn in Fisherman's Wharf. I know straw polls mean nothing but they have become an early-in-the-campaign way for Ron Paul supporters to rally togther and to vote for their guy. In fact Paul won a majority of the straw polls held around the country. I hadn't been too involved with this MeetUp group so I felt like I really should go down there and vote. So I show up and apparently I'm early. Or at least I'm early for the second part of the night which was to be a straw poll. The first part was a dinner and a long speech by a Thompson supporter. Total for the dinner and poll was $35 I believe. If you just wanted to do the poll then it was $5. So I show up at 7:30 and I ask to pay the $5 for the poll and the lady taking money says she don't no nuthin about no $5 fee. She's says I need to talk to Gail, a lady in a red hat (Santa hat I later learned), but she's inside. I crane my neck a few times "inside" but I don't see a red hatted lady. Just then someone I knew from the MeetUp comes up. I learn from her that she's just going to pony up the $35 but that she'll look out for Gail and get some more info for me if she can.

So I go to a bar. A bar where they pay me to be there (practically). Especially if this one psychotic dude comes in and sits at the bar. They like me to be there just in case. In case of what I don't know. I'd probably bolt for the door if Son of Sam started sprayin'. So they're buying free beers and this is strong beer, Racer 5 from Healdsburg, CA 7-8% alc. and an hour goes by (oh yeah they told me when to come back and that the poll was delayed another half hour). So I call my MeetUp buddy on the scene after an hour and she says that it's been delayed another hour. So I order a few more Racers.

I then walk the few blocks back to the Holiday Inn and I see that the $5 entrance fee miscommunication had been taken care of. I also notice that there's a bunch of Ron Paul people. I can tell they're Ron Paul people because they all have signs and they're not dressed up. So we wait for a few minutes and then they let us in. There's a lady, Gail Neira, who is speaking from a podium. She says it's really great to see the Ron Paul people out and she cautions us to not be "one issue" voters. I think she was implying here a misunderstanding on her part that we're supporting Ron Paul because we're against the War. That's true but there's a lot else and the war is just the tipparillo. So I says to the people around me I don't know "Oh no weeze got LOTTSA issues." For which I got some mild polite laughter. Then some 40 yr. old woman comes up to me and said something with a smile on her face which I didn't understand so I assumed she was insane and ignored her. Then Gail at the podium goes: "And yep, I'm gonna do it. I'm going to cancel tonight's straw poll." Audience: "Wha' pa hab- brob- sha-na." Gail "It's because you all came at the end, paid $5 and others have been here all night, they paid $35."

Me: "Bullshit!"
Me: "I'll pay everyone here's $35 ticket!" *

Then the rest is a blur. I shuffled around for a minute, told someone who looked familiar that I had to leave or I'd start throwing chairs and I went back to the bar to tell everyone (including Son of S.) what had just happened.

Refecting back on that night, the Paul supporters were visibly upset and had reason to be, even though this was just a stupid poll. Hell, I was pissed just because I had waited all night. The next day Gail's speech and our reaction was all over You Tube and Digg. I knew that my "bullshit" shout would make it to video and be seen by thousands. I have not watched the videos out embarassment. However I'm not ashamed of what I shouted or who I shouted it to. I was a little self critical because I had drank a fair bit and realize that a lot of my reaction was ethyl-fueled. Since then I have learned that Paul Revere himself was imbibing rum in Medford, MA at a pub on the night of his ride. "Without a doubt that drink of old Medford Rum provided Paul Revere with the pick-me-up he needed to complete his trip to Lexington." and this "he who came a silent horseman, departed a virile and vociferous crusader, with a cry of defiance and not of fear." --That was pretty much me too. And although I didn't have to ride with my horse through miles and miles of forest in the middle of the night, I did have to tear myself away from free beer and walk three blocks, wait around and then be blocked by a lady in a Santa hat (which is red and white just like a Redcoat's uniform). So I see a lot of similarities with the Midnight Ride of Paul Revere and the 10pm GOP Clusterfuck of which Howie participated.

My offering to freedom may not have been as perfect as I'd liked it to have been and it may not have been as heroic or important as Paul Revere's ride but they both involved alcohol. They both involved "being there". They both involved a bit of chutzpa. And they both involved leaving before things got too out of hand and you end up getting hurt. Revere was detained by the British on his way to Concord and spent the night in their custody so he didn't see the battle. Likewise, I didn't see the battle. Apparently the Ron Paul supporters hung around for a while and got more amped up. An older guy got in Santa lady's face and told her she was an embarassment to the party. Security got called in, etc. I like to think that I was the one who threw lighter fluid on their anarchistic fires that night. I'll never know because I didn't stick around much to see Act 2.

My point: Don't really have one, just wanted to get that off my chest since I hadn't told anyone except my friend Reg because he had seen me do something similar at a gig my band was having at an art show once.

Dear Ron Paul supporters: Don't drink and protest -lesson already learned by 40 yr old who should know better. Be on your guard. You never know when BULLSHIT! like this is going to happen. It's best to be sober from now until the Primaries are over. And please stop inviting me to shit that will cause me to get all indignant, which is pretty much anything.

* Later the math of what I had said hit me $30 x 100 people = $3,000 -glad 'ol Gail didn't take me up on it!

There's been a small hub-bub lately on Mike Huckabee's Xmas ad in which the camera pans around to reveal in the background a white bookshelf, which looks a helluva like a floating white cross. Many have seen this as a thinly veiled attempt at pandering to the Christian Right and given Huckabee's endless shout-outs to Jesus whenever a microphone is nearby, the accusation is probably not that big of a stretch. But what concerns me more about this ad is not the cross but the three balls on one of the shelves. Everybody knows that three balls arranged in this manner is the international symbol for "pawn shop." Now one could draw many conclusions from this symbol being overtly positioned in a campaign ad. Is Huckabee asking us to recall obscure Sublime lyrics like: "Down there at the pawn shop it's only way to shop"? Or is that he feels we'll all be headed for the pawn shop to sell our personal effects when his "fair tax" kicks in and adds a 30% federal tax onto every sale? Maybe its a subtle reminder to fellow musicians (he plays bass in a band) that many fine deals on instruments can be had at your local pawn shop. Or maybe Huckabee is himself a member of the secretive sect of pawnshop owners who have governed the affairs of mankind since the days of the Pharao.